While you dwell in the past, let me ask you: does it relieve you of stress and tension? I am sure your answer is never "yes" for there is a connection between what you had been and what you are now. Although I must admit that the past and present are interconnected, but your present must weigh heavier in preparation for what you will be.
Old painful memories must go for they will only add hurts to your bruised ego. Sweet memories must stay to keep you awake with hope and inspiration. The past is a mixture of dark and bright rays, it is your resolve that must contain which one must stay.
Charles R. Swindoll, an American Writer once wrote: “We cannot change our past. We can not change the fact that people act in a certain way. We can not change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.”
Well said. Like the flow of the wind, the past shall haunt you, not because you hide from it but because it is inside you. You will live with it all throughout your life. But you are not without a choice. You can decide to be free from your own misery. Therefore, may I ask, why do you choose to get stuck?
If there is a need to review the past, let those discovered from the diggings be lessons of history and have no direct bearing whatsoever on the present. If you allow the past to control you, problems will block the happiness that is rightfully owned by the present.
Life memories that happened in the past are reminders that there were moments in it that should be studied well to avoid a repeat of the same mistakes. To go into the details over and over again will sabotage your present happiness for you will re-experience the misery that you try hard to evade. Why allow such a sad refrain, why not instead prevail and move on?
RESOLVE TO UNDERSTAND
Understand that human emotions tend to be weak if a gloomy memory will be recalled. Why not instead edit your past to learn lessons from what is relevant and transform what used to be bad?
Understand that many people will not talk on the details that brought them so much pain thus it is expected that they would not share what existed before then.
Lovers must learn to respect if their partners refuse to unearth what prevailed in their history that they prefer untouched.
Do not fight with a partner because of a past that could not be undone. Think positively and prevail over emotionality. The past is not an enemy but a lesson to learn from.
RESOLVE TO LEARN AND TRANSFORM
Life teaches lessons that will make or unmake a man. Even those who felt incomplete by past events can rise above the ruins and make a home for the present as the future is about to come. The negatives shall prevail only if they are allowed to be. Stand to be positive at all times so that your energy and focus will help you achieve where you aim to be in a place under the moon and the sun, a place of your own.
Transform all the bad things of your past to something that you can share in the present. Filter your mind and drain sadness out of it. Refill your thoughts with hope and determination by allowing yourself to grow blissfully.
RESOLVE TO HOPE
Hope comes with optimism and optimism lives with hope. You must always carry the smile when you are in the sea of the unknown. Some people carry in their souls the trauma they had in the past, hence, it is hard for them to follow the path where they could realize their full potentials.
What prevents them from not achieving is their fear of being attached with a stigma that many people might see as bad. Let those who misjudge be judged instead by the law of God. You do not need to explain who you are and why you did the things in the past. Move on quietly without much funfare. It is a personal decision, yours and not others to decide on.
RESOLVE TO BE TRUE
The freedom from the past starts with truthfulness. The ability to accept things as they are now and make use of what is existing as a capital for your future dreams. Investing in positivism will guide your way in life. But other than being that, you must always allow yourself to face life genuinely with a goal.
If unreachable for now, but once worked on, nothing is impossible.
Be complete. Be inspired. Life is enough as an inspiration to start all over again. As you can view from a distance a dying man from the window of life, you must feel lucky that compared to him, you have the health and the strength to succeed in your aspirations.
As for the painful past, let the past die. Bury it. Do not let it destroy whatever beautiful you have in the present. Learn from lessons of history but never forget to live for the present and future.